I seriously have to just bite the bullet here. It is time. Fun is over-no more games. No more ignoring. No more avoiding this one little word....
I am going on a diet. And, I truly hope that typing it right here right now on this page will force me to be serious about it.
My biggest problem? I will not lie-I LIKE bad food. I truly enjoy fast food. I crave cookie dough. I actually got up the other evening after I thought I was in bed for the night because I was craving chocolate chip cookie dough. I made some from scratch, ate half of it and froze the other half for future cookie dough cravings and self-medication.
I have had more pictures taken of me in the last 2 months since HK's arrival than I have ever in my life. And-I have to say that I am actually SHOCKED when I see myself in these photos. How is that possible, you ask? Well-apparently I am the QUEEN of denial. The QUEEN of self-preservation. The QUEEN of confidence and self-love. I have made it all right to look the way that I do because I have allowed it and told myself that it is all right. So, all of this love has given me 30 additional pounds TO love. And, since I am also a master of fluctuation, some days only 30 additional pounds would be just dandy.
Well-my friends, NO MORE.
Again-the more caps I use and the more I type it, the more I will have to pay attention to it. I am hoping that tomorrow when I am out and about delivering samples and such for work and pass by a fast food restaurant at lunch time, I will say to myself, "No, eat the fiber bar in your purse that you brought along for such moments of temptation and weakness because you BLOGGED about dieting. You must at least try for the sake of those poor people who actually read your whoa is me reel, fatty."
So-here's to another day. I will try to actually count points and be a responsible, calorie counting adult. God love those who will be dealing with me for the next few weeks while my stomach shrinks. Here's to "lifestyle changes!!!"
It's just me-and all of my idiosyncrasies. I work full time, I am married, and I love my dog. We just adopted a baby girl. I am completely contradictory, I am a girlie girl, and I am impatient. I like breakfast for dinner. I like apples and peanut butter. I like wine. I like entertaining. I like sleeping. I like labels and I can be a b-with an-itch when I want to be or am pushed. I want to give my baby every opportunity in the world, and I want to teach her values and the rewards of hard work. I want more children and am scared to death of the uncertainties of adoption even though I have already done it. I love my husband. I hate that I weigh the most I ever have in my whole life. I want my husband to make a zillion dollars a year, and I want him to put up his laundry and clothes when I ask. I want what most people want-and here is my story-day by day!